It is an undeniable truth; you will not leave high school with the same friends you started with. Quite frankly, that’s okay. Change is a natural part of growth; it is through these shifts that we often discover our true selves and the people who truly align with who we have become. To that end, change is uncomfortable but worth it in the end.

While you may grow at one pace, others may develop at an entirely different rate. If you find yourself outgrowing someone, and they no longer invest the time or energy you need, it is perfectly fine to walk away. Do not waste your time trying to revive something that is no longer flourishing, because just like dead flowers, it will never return to what it once was.

High school creates many different people, all with different aspirations and goals. While you may want to get your master’s degree in chemical engineering, that friend you made freshman year may want to go to a trade school, both perfectly fine paths for the bright futures each person might want. Regardless, your goals should align with your own path, just as theirs should reflect their own vision for the future. Ultimately, it is important to remember that each person is on their own journey and everyone’s life is determined by their personal choices.

Reflecting on your freshman year, think about who you aspired to be and what your goals were at that time. Chances are, your dreams back then were rather different from what your goals are today, simply because you have grown and evolved. 

Now, consider this idea in relation to your friends. Just as your goals and identity have changed, so can theirs. Their personalities, goals, relationships and values may shift over time. With that in mind, it is more than okay to take a step back and acknowledge that change is a natural part of life, both for you and for those around you.

While the tender experience of outgrowing a friend or significant other may sting in the moment, know that greater and more fulfilling opportunities are on the way. You need to have patience. As someone who struggles with waiting, I understand how frustrating that can sound, but trust that good happenings are coming. This part of your journey is about creating your own path— you hold the power to decide who stays and who leaves. With that control, everything will eventually align because you are the only suitable judge of what is truly best for your life.

High school is a pivotal chapter in your life, one that passes in the blink of an eye. Adults often tell us that “high school is the best time of your life,” and as I reflect on my own experience, I cannot help but laugh because, frankly, high school was not at all what I imagined it would be. However, despite the surprises and challenges, I would not change a thing about these past four years. High school taught me the value of hard work, the importance of building meaningful, strong relationships and most importantly, how to grow and forge myself into the person I am today.